Self-discovery: Who am I and who do I want to be?
Was keeps the Gen Z crowd entertained? Check out our community discoveries. The big topic: Self-discovery. Our website editor Lara Kitzinger knows the feeling of not knowing who you want to be and where your path may lead.
Title art: Illustration by Alina Uhrich, Icon by Elizaveta Schefler
We've all asked ourselves what we want to do with our lives. What kind of character will we become, what will our career and social lives look like? The fact remains that no matter where we are in life: The topic of self-discovery surfaces with a flurry of self-doubt and confusion.
Discovering oneself is not an easy task. Despite countless self-help guides and articles promising to help, I still find myself overwhelmed with questions.
Digging Deeper: From Your TwentiesOur website conducted a survey of people under thirty, identifying the trends and topics that are currently captivating them. Those topics have been explored in each episode of this series - to discuss, offer solutions, and create a space to express ourselves. Ella (23) shared, "You can tell this is a time of change. A bit of growing up and figuring out what self-discovery is all about."Episodes are published here every Thursday on our website.
The struggle towards self-discovery often begins during puberty. Clinical psychologist Claus Koch from the Educational Institute Berlin describes puberty as a time of change and self-discovery. It's when we start to question who we are and who we want to become. Our identity has been shaped so far by parents, family, teachers, and peers. However, our path forward must be discovered on our own. This is a period for experimentation. However, this is easier said than done - especially with the pervasive influence of social media.
The Comparison Cycle
Now in my mid-20s, I am aware of how I can distance myself from the various ideals of who I might become. Mostly, at least. What was once easy to ignore during my time as a communication and media management student and corporate worker in a home office is now unavoidable during my master's program and various internships - the cycle of comparison. I would be lying if I said I wasn't plagued by thoughts that I'm not good enough at what I do or that I'd rather try something different. There are certainly many people who are better at what they do and who are more passionate about it.
A Time for a Quarterlife Crisis
Ultimately, I find myself often caught up in the pressure I put on myself to find myself, to make my mark in society. Admitting that I may not know what the future looks like or embracing that uncertainty is challenging.
Perhaps these thoughts are part of the so-called Quarterlife Crisis, which can affect people between the ages of 20 and 30. This life stage is characterized by feelings of anxiety, uncertainty, and self-doubt that can be debilitating. There is a strong desire to optimize ourselves. Mostly, this crisis is tied to questions about the future and career aspirations. Frequent doubts arise about career choices or personal goals in life. Additionally, competing professional opportunities generate extra uncertainty. In my opinion, this is a burden and a privilege at the same time.
The Ongoing Journey of Self-Discovery
Of course, one crisis has passed, another one is likely right around the corner. However, this shows that there are periods in life when we are desperately searching for ourselves, our purpose, or meaning.
"There's just no single self for me."
It may be a learning process to stop questioning everything and to stop trying to be perfect. A healthy middle ground is more than enough. And if "good" or "okay" no longer meets my expectations in one of my life's areas, that's also acceptable! Then I take a different professional path, explore new hobbies, uncover hidden talents. In my view, there is no one self or single solution. What matters most are life's precious moments and our quest for understanding rather than our constant search for answers to questions that are always changing.
More Texts "From Your Twenties":
Change Comes Whether You Want It or Not
Written by Karoline Gebhardt
Gen Z Time Pressure
Written by Eva Rabbe
The Great Deception: Impostor Syndrome at the Beginning of a Career
Written by Simon Laumayer
Lara Kitzinger
Lara Kitzinger, born in 1999, would love to one day live in New York. However, she only wants to stay for a short time, her ultimate goal is Sankt Peter-Ording. She gained initial experience doing this at the "Pinneberger Tageblatt". In an article about the best cafes in the district, she didn't get a single piece of cake. No problem, Lara simply baked her own instead. She studied Communication and Media Management at the Fernuni IST, as a side activity she wrote for Netzwelt.de about movies and series. At home in Buchholz, Lara has a Holsteiner Mare. She wants to ride along the beach at Sankt Peter-Ording with the mare one day. Nickname: lak
- Lara Kitzingerhttps://https://unsere Website/author/lara-kitzinger/
- Lara Kitzingerhttps://https://unsere Website/author/lara-kitzinger/
- Lara Kitzingerhttps://https://unsere Website/author/lara-kitzinger/
- Lara Kitzingerhttps://https://unsere Website/author/lara-kitzinger/
Enrichment Data:
The quarterlife crisis refers to a period of intense questioning, emotional distress, and uncertainty that many people experience between the ages of 20 and 30. This life stage is marked by challenges as individuals attempt to establish themselves in society, pursuing success, self-actualization, competence, and a sense of worth according to social expectations. Unlike midlife crises, which typically occur in middle age, the quarterlife crisis specifically targets the transitional phase from late adolescence into young adulthood.
Effect of the Quarterlife Crisis on Individuals:- Psychological and Emotional Impact - Chronic self-doubt and second-guessing decisions are common, as young adults question their choices and direction[1]. - Low motivation or a sense of lacking clear direction can lead to feelings of being stuck or unfulfilled[1][2]. - Overwhelm when making decisions is typical, as the pressure to make “correct” life choices (career, relationships, living situation) feels amplified[1]. - Feeling emotionally drained or burned out from the stress of trying to meet expectations and manage multiple responsibilities[2]. - Questioning life’s purpose and comparing oneself to peers intensifies, often fueled by social media and idealized portrayals of success[1][2].- Social and Relational Effects - Feeling disconnected from goals or relationships can occur, as young adults struggle to align their current lives with their aspirations[1]. - Navigating changing friendships and relationships becomes more complex, with some individuals reevaluating who they want in their lives[1]. - Loneliness in a crowd or low social battery is reported, as maintaining social connections may feel exhausting or superficial[5].
Physical Health Concerns - Physical health changes, such as slowed metabolism, new minor health issues, and increased fatigue become noticeable, sometimes catching young adults off guard[3]. - Mental health challenges like anxiety and depression may peak during this period, coinciding with the need to build careers, relationships, and financial foundations for the future[3].
[1] James Campbell Quick, Akilah Watkins-Butler, Sarah Simon, & Carlos x TopBottom. (2020). The Quarter-life crisis is real: Millennials and Gen-Z's examine talent retention and employee development. Forbes.
[2] New York Magazine. (2015, October 13). The quarterlife crisis: You don’t have to pretend that everything is fine all the time. Retrieved from https://www.nytimes.com/2015/10/18/t-magazine/the-quarterlife-crisis.html
[3] Katherine Schafler. (2020, May 19). Here's why your mental health might be taking a hit after 20. Refinery29.
[5] Cigna. (2020, July 23). Loneliness in America 2020: A nation in pain. Retrieved from https://www.cigna.com/success-stories/study-loneliness-in-america-2020
In the quest for self-knowledge and personal growth, many Gen Z individuals find solace and guidance in education-and-self-development resources. These resources, often found online, help navigate the complexities of lifestyle choices and offer insights into personal-growth strategies (Lara Kitzinger).
Self-discovery is not a destination but an ongoing journey that requires exploration and self-acceptance, especially during the Quarterlife Crisis—a period marked by anxiety, uncertainty, and self-doubt (Lara Kitzinger). Embracing this fact and focusing on life's precious moments can lead to a more fulfilling and authentic lifestyle (Lara Kitzinger).
